only three???

one of my favorite customers gave me this silly little "homework assignment" yesterday

- come to work tomorrow with your THREE all time favorite songs

WTF??

choose just THREE??

ALL TIME???

pisshhaaawwww!!!!

so naturally, much like i have done in all of my academic endeavors, i procrastinated.  which, in one day, doesn't buy you ANY time.  

so when he came by the next day, literally bouncing to hear our faves, i told him i didn't do it.

i just "forgot"

truth is, 

i don't want to share that with anyone.

thats MINE

those songs mean so much to me- and there are many more than just THREE- so why would I put myself out there to anyone??  music is more than that.  it is ever-changing, it means more or less to you depending on what you're dealing with or going through at any one particular time.  so- i fudged them some.

blah blah blah....

Doobie Brothers "without love"- for Dad.

then for nostalgic reasons: "amber" by 311 (yeah, I'm old- i get it)

anything recent by Miguel (dreamy sigh)

and then derrrrr, afterwards though of one of my faves- John mayer (don't hate)

dont know what it is- maybe the INCREDIBLE way the boy plays the guitar, or the lyrics, or something else, but I LOVE THIS SONG!!! yeah, I've heard he's kinda a prick- but seriously...if the first 30 seconds of this song don't make you need to just BREATHE in and out ONCE- then you're an asshole. 

http://youtu.be/Bn0NLQI-l08

(yeah- a LINK.  I'm still a moron when it comes to this blog thing- so if you know how to post an actual effing video from youtube to this using my ipad, id love to hear it)

what i am thinking RIGHT NOW

i think that life is just a big mind fuck.

you go through it wondering "why", that transitions to 

"why, not" which only leads to 

"why the fuck"

you think that youre doing it "right"

being good at everything that society tells you youre supposed to be good at

be smart

be GOOD LOOKING

be loyal

be honest

be fun

be charming

be carefree

be PERFECT

be selfless

be everything to everyone, all the time. 

...but what does that get YOU??

good fucking question 

ps- i literally wrote "be selfless" FOUR FUCKING TIMES before I edited this..... 

wonder what I've been focused on BEING......

yet, still not enough.  awesome.  

"i want you to be all mine"

well okay, 

but do you mind

if i keep some of myself,

for myself

so that when you leave me

there is still something left?

-Jackson Lange